Costco unveils epic 1.3kg chocolate Christmas stocking

Twisted: Unserious food tastes seriously good.

Eating an excessive amount over the Christmas period is basically the law. In many households, if you don’t feel slightly sick by mid-morning, you’re just not doing it right. 

For anyone who is unsure how best to get in the over-indulgent Christmas spirit, ridiculous bulk-buying specialist Costco has come up with an elegant solution. Instead of breeding giant turkeys or moulding vast Christmas puddings in an elf-fired furnace, the store has unleashed a giant Christmas stocking, complete with 1.3 kilos of candy. Santa might struggle to fit down many chimneys after sampling a few of these. 

The item is equipped with a range of everyone’s favourite sugary goodies, and is loaded with over 100 individual sweeties. Included on the epic contents list are Cadbury Dairy Milk, Mars, Kitkat, Milky Way, Lindt balls, Hershey’s white chocolate wrapped in the festive plastic parcel and Trolli lollies. Bon appetit. 

Unsurprisingly for such a chocolate-heavy bonanza, the calorie count is pretty mind-boggling. According to calculations made by the Daily Mail newspaper, the entire stocking contains a stonking 16,032 calories – meaning that attempting to tackle it on your own is seriously inadvisable, even at Christmas. 

If you’re feeling hungry and Christmassy, here’s our Chocolate Hazelnut Christmas Tree Tower:

Unsurprisingly, the sheer indulgence of the gift has caused some blow-back. Melbourne-based teacher Sharon Witt, told the Mail:

“This is just ridiculous. I think it’s over the top and inappropriate particularly when it’s targeted at children.

“The only way this would be acceptable is if it was a gift that was meant to be shared with the entire extended family.”

With a retail price of $29 AUD, it remains to be seen whether the stocking can make a serious seasonal impact. However, other responses to the product have been much more positive, with some commentators on Facebook suggesting the stocking is reason enough to “renew” Costco membership. Who says there’s no such thing as Christmas spirit?