Girl Scout Cookie Sales Go Through The Roof After Fifth-Grader Puts Shirtless Jason Momoa On Box

Twisted: Unserious food tastes seriously good.

Standing out in sales can be tough. As anyone who’s ever had to go door to door to try and flog perennially snooty and superior customers something that they neither want nor need knows, selling is a thankless task. If you play it by the book, the job can become interminable. Sometimes, if you want to both see success and no longer crave the sweet release of death, a salesperson needs to be prepared to think outside the box.

cookies and milk[[imagecaption|| Credit: Pixabay/Pezibear]]

One of the USA’s more celebrated child labour traditions is the custom of girl scout cookies. Every year, thousands of small, uniformed biscuit vendors descend upon the doorsteps of middle America, flogging sugary baked goods to impatient families everywhere. Pretending to look interested as a green clad cookie pixie tells you about their badges is a dance as old as time. For the girl scouts themselves, standing out from the crowd as they march around town can seem almost impossible. However, where there’s a will, there’s a way.

Following in the footsteps of enterprising forebears who have sold snacks to everyone from stoned college students to Childish Gambino, a fifth grade Coloradan girl scout has come up with one of the most inventive methods yet to maximise her profits. Instead of selling standard, plain packets of cookie, Charlotte Holmberg and her mother came up with a devious way to appeal to an entirely different demographic. The plan was simple. Stun potential buyers into agreement with a topless photo of Hollywood hunk/Dothraki warlord Jason Momoa. Apparently, it works.


The enterprising Charlotte used an image of the muscle-bound actor, taken from his latest movie Aquaman and plastered onto the front of her box, to add a certain visual appeal to the product. To top it off, she renamed the traditional samoas “Momoas” in his honour – though, judging by his imposing physique, the star probably doesn’t indulge in many sweet treats on his day off.

Despite not receiving an explicit Momoa seal of approval, the tactic has clearly worked. CNN report that “Charlotte’s supply of Momoa cookies quickly sold out”. Reaction on the street has been almost universally positive. Speaking to reporters in the aftermath of the topless cookie frenzy, Holmberg revealed that, “The moms are getting really excited and they’re saying that they need them.”


However, despite what may seem like a harmless bit of suggestive ingenuity, some have claimed that Holmberg’s strategy could land her in hot water. The official post on the Girl Scouts of Colorado Facebook page soon had several critical comments, focused on everything from branding to being shirtless. One user wrote that GSOC should “Expect a letter from Warner Bros.,” whilst another condemned the cookies as, “so not appropriate”. As a response, the Girl Scouts have revealed that the cookies are no longer on the market and that, “Once those boxes were sold, she continued with her Girl Scout Cookie season as usual.” It just goes to show that even if you think your idea is a winner,