Pizza-flavoured candy canes are now a thing

Twisted: Unserious food tastes seriously good.

Now that Christmas is as much an excuse for a commercial orgy as it is about baby Jesus, it’s hardly surprising that companies are finding new and interesting ways of shoehorning their produce onto festive shopping lists. Some try and add Christmassy things to some of the least Christmassy items imaginable. Others bring Christmas to them. This year, novelty gift specialists Archie McPhee have emphatically opted for the latter approach. 

In a Christmas twist that is simultaneously hilarious and horrifying, Archie McPhee are now offering their customers pizza-flavoured candy canes. For anyone used to multi-coloured peppermint poles, this will no doubt come as a shock. However, with a retail price of $6.50 for a set of six, there’s no doubt that the company is deadly serious about turning seasonal sweets savoury. 

The official product description on the Archie McPhee website states: 

“If you want pizza flavor, these candy canes deliver! (In 30 minutes or less.) A sure sign of the quality of these canes is the personified pizza slice on the package. Who wouldn’t trust that face? This set of six candy canes is like a little slice of Italian-spiced heaven, allegedly cooked in a candy-fired oven by Sicilian elves. Each candy cane is 5-1/4″ tall with red and yellow stripes.”

Despite the claims of elf-operated ovens, the bullet-pointed product summary admits that the canes are in fact “not baked in a wood fire oven,” though it does assert that “each cane is a little slice of heaven.”

Don’t fancy pizza-flavoured candy cane? Check out this delicious Candy Cane Chocolate Tart Recipe:

While the pizza flavour will probably prove the most popular among fast food enthusiasts, it’s by no means the only oddity that Archie McPhee is releasing. Food & Wine reports that the company are also offering “hamdy canes” and “kale candy canes”, the latter of which delivers “the bitter grassiness of your favorite vegetable.” Even if you aren’t a naturally Christmassy person, this year promises to be a party in your mouth.